"apathy"

​by C. Ikpoh

"The eternal flame of hope that burns in my spirit is slowly being extinguished with each passing moment. Every day the words and actions of people become more contradictory to the righteous efforts I put forth to aid them. Never did I expect to be peering over a cliff's ledge into the Sea of Apathy. Alas, here I stand." - CEI

Here I stand. Yet, my better sense tells me to lay down, for why am I standing to show strength in a world that lacks such a thing?

My eyes tire from canvassing the horizon searching for a reason to care about the rest in existence. Beyond my immediate lineage, there is none reflecting any reason for why I should care, any reason to wake up and have my conscious shed a singular non-selfish thought. All I envision are cased within the guise of cordiality and sincerity when they are, in fact, hollow to the core with empty hearts beating to their own rhythm. I see through their porous shells though, and as I do, the sight of the ever-thinning human purpose repulses me further inward. My pupils bleed with the last remaining drops from the River of Hope. They can no longer paint pictures with inconsequential brush strokes without aching. The eyes of apathy do not betray me.

I hear voices carried on the winds. They speak of the most mundane events as if they truly are of importance. Words, once priceless, have been devalued to the likes of the lowest commodity. Their sound slides off my eardrums with grease from the tongues that delivered them. I listen to the collective broadcast of thoughts and I can distinguish nothing pertinent. Nothing. Not one single thing. Thus, silence is the blessing above all other blessings, for hearing peace reign over those who believe in the pseudo ingenuity and importance of their message would be Heaven on earth. The medium which once enabled my ability to relate and connect with my fellow man has been dissolved by their deficiency of substance and value, both formal and informal. The ears of apathy do not betray me.

I can feel the absence of a touch I care to endure. There is no love amongst the selfish. There is no interest amongst the shallow. There is no tolerance amongst the petty. Therefore, since the latter three comprise most of the world, there is no need to immerse myself into a reality or any of its alternatives, for they look to handle my life with the prickly, abrasive fingertips which have emerged on the hands of time. Consequently, I yearn for the days when I was caressed by the ideals of virtuous dreams, when I was massaged by the hopes of a righteous spirit. I deeply desire the return of this age. Nevertheless, all I have is the heavy weight of lies and crushed souls placed on my shoulders by the world and all those in it. The skin of apathy does not betray me.

My eyes are becoming blind, my ears are becoming deaf, and my skin is becoming numb. Because of apathy, my heart grows weak. I am evolving into the apathy of our modern age.